Yesterday, as I learned of the death of Maya Angelo
I went to find some of the thing's that she spoke and wrote,
that touched so many lives.
I found this clip...and it made me smile...
Maya said, "I look at my life as a class"
I feel this way to, but I said it different...
"I look at life as learning"
I believe the Lord sent us here to learn...
however the choice to learn is ours and ours alone.
Like Maya, I believe we are ALL loved equally.
however some make choices that harm...
if we can love...like the lord loves,
we can have a deeper understanding and compassion for human nature...
with this understanding and compassion...
comes utter humility
As my children hit there teen years...
I realized..."Anything my child can do...your child can do,
and anything your child can do, my child can do." yet so many times
there were parents who said, "No, not my child"
they assumed there parenting, would keep there child from doing certain things.
I have learned that a child can struggle that comes's from a wonderful,
well parented home! And another child, who came from great dysfunction can thrive.
who our children become, is only part parenting...the rest is the soul we are given.
and they like us...are allowed choice's.
We can choose to take the heartache of life and let it make us bitter...
or we can choose to learn!
There were times I looked into the heavens and wanted a time out!
But the learning never ceases.
I have learned to embrace it..and truly see the gifts in each obstacles
that comes my way...
I realize now, I will NEVER know it all.
I will never understand it all,
I will never be any better then anyone else..
I just am!
But I made a choice to learn..from anything and everything..
that choice has been the greatest gift I have ever given myself.
I realized I am getting there...slowly one step at a time.
some learning curves take longer...but I strive to learn the lesson.
With this mind set...judgement of others has slowly gone out the door.
AND I had the nerve to think I wasn't judge mental...but I was.
I reacted as most humans would...because I had learned from humans
to react like this!
Yesterday my daughter shared with me about the women in California,
who killed her 3 little girls. Ages 3- 2 months. In that moment..my heart lurched...
but it didn't lurch with the anger, disgust and conviction of evil in her..like it would
have 20 years ago...it lurched with utter 'Pain' for her.
There is evil out there! there are women who have killed...
but these women also abused.
The difference is in.."what kind of mother they truly were"
the difference is in the "shock" , of it, from family, friends and neighbor's!
Andrea Yates, drowned her 5 children. Yet family was trying to get her help.
No one understood why her husband stood by her.
Yet she truly loved her children..everyone saw this.
and who would know that more then her husband.
later, she let him go...he is now remarried and has another child...
but he stays in contact with her...
she has been on suicide watch countless times...
can you imagine waking up from a mental breakdown
realizing that what you loved most...you destroyed!
This woman in California also had happy healthy girls.
she loved them...but somehow she also broke...
to judge this...is wrong for we are human...
it is NOT our place. She needed help, these things happen to teach
us the reality of mental illness, Harmon changes, and that no one is immune.
It was the maternal grandma who called in...
can you imagine that mothers pain as well?...
and so I feel the 'Pain"
and I realized how different from when I had anger, and judged,
condemned and sent them to Hell mentally speaking...
I think about the children and I have no answers accept,
I picture the lords arms around them in those moments...
We have choices...and we can become bitter and judge..or see the world,
In a whole new 'Picture'.
Maya Angelou choose to learn, and she has left behind a legacy that
will never leave...she was a earthly teacher.
I pray that I can leave behind for my children and grandchildren a
legacy of what life and love...truly is....
that is my